Week 4: Differences in Swelling

(June 29th, 2016)

Omg, I can't believe it's been FOUR weeks. That's crazy. I feel incredibly lucky that my progress thus far has been sooo damn good - way better than I ever imagined!

Also, it's my birthday in 2 days! Ahhh! :D

Four Week Video Update

I go a little more in depth about what I'm eating and how to give yourself a light facial massage.

(So here's the problem with posting every week or even every few days - I don't remember the important points of my week! I should probably write them down, but it's hard to not be "in the moment" and have to think "I need to write this down for my blog!" I'll work on it.)

Doctor's Visit

I saw my surgeon two days ago. The visit was super quick. He looked at my bite and my stitches, then answered a few questions. Here goes:

• I should be sticking to soft foods. 
• I should keep working on opening up my jaws/bite.
• Incision sites/stitches look good.
• The stitches will fall out on their own in a few weeks.
• For my residual swelling, I can use heat, then massage, then ice.
• I will see him again in two weeks.

That's it! I really should have taken a picture of my x-ray with all of the screws and plates in it. I'll have to make sure to do that next time and show you guys.

Uneven Swelling (that's a good thing!)

About 50% of the time, my normal sitting/relaxed position while watching TV (when I'm not on my phone or iPad) is with my hands somewhere on my face/jaw/neck area. And the other night I suddenly realized that my right jawline was less puffy than my left! So of course I immediately jumped out of bed to take pictures for me/you guys. Haha. Even though I had on zero makeup and some of the pictures were quite unattractive (you'll see). But I figured it's good to show you the real un-made-up version of me once in a while. Cuz, really, they're all me. The nice pictures and the yucky pictures - that's what I look like as a real person. With all of the filters and posed crap that inundate our eyeballs in ALL kinds of media (on Instagram and Facebook, in print media like magazines and ads, on TV and in the movies) I feel like I constantly have to remind myself that what I see is NOT REAL. They're Photoshop-ed and beautified and perfected versions of people/life. The good thing that I've noticed is that kids realize this. Having grown up in the age of filters, they get that everything is kinda fake. Good for them!

Sorry about my rant. That came outta nowhere, huh?

Anyway, here are some of the pictures I took.

These aren't yucky - they're just me. Notice how my left cheek (your right)
is chubbier than my right cheek? I swear I didn't turn or tilt my face.
Also, omg, my nose is still crooked. Wth.

I can't believe I'm posting this. But here you can
really see the difference in the swelling. So neat!

Acne

That reminds me. I totally have little pimples all over my chin! They're tiny little whiteheads and bumps. Once in a while, I get a normal sized pimple. I still think this has something to do with the bandages that were on my chin area for 6 days. Although... it seems that a lot of people get their bandages taken off on day 2 but they still get acne. Hrmmm. I don't know. Once again, I'll just count myself lucky (for now) to just be having problems on my chin. (Knock on wood.)

I even started looking into acne facials. :P And I've been researching acid peels and laser treatments. I know I sound crazy to some people, but I swear these are common and not out-of-the-ordinary insane. Uh, unless they are and I just don't know it because I live in Southern California. ??? There's actually this at-home fraxel laser, Tria Age-Defying Laser, that increases collagen production, diminishes fine lines and wrinkles, fades old acne scars and sun spots, and seems to help with acne. The only problem is that it's $500. Most people love it. But, again, it's $500. I'll sleep on it. And, yes, I feel the need to defy my age. I have issues. See above rant.

My 4-week pictures. (What a difference makeup makes, right?)

Another terrible lighting bathroom pic.
Sorry - no more daylight.

Pain: 2-3/10

Numbness: Bottom gums numb on the outside portion. Chin area and right side of jaw still tingly/numb, but getting better. 

Discomfort: My cheeks keep getting stuck in the brackets when I talk. Wax/silicone all day every day.

Weight: -5 lbs (That's a NEW pound, guys. However, let's keep in mind that I gained about 7-8 pounds before the surgery, so I'm still "over" my normal weight. Darn this excellent healing! Just kidding just kidding I love my not-rubber-banded new bite!)

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

~m

Week 3.5: Feelings!

(June 26th, 2016)

Numbness is Dissipating?! 

Yes, just like everyone else says in their blogs - one day, you wake up with more FEELINGS. I have totally normal sensations everywhere except:

My Lower Gums
I think I now have full sensation on the inner part of my lower gums (so behind my teeth). The outer part of my gums, the part you would be able to see if I went "GRRRR!" like a rabid dog is still completely numb. It's numb to about half-way where the stitches start. The part around the stitches is super tender. Actually, one little part of the stitches came undone and when I pulled on it (I don't know why I pulled on it - maybe to see where it was still attached?) it really really stung like a mother.

My Chin/Jaw Area
For the longest time, the part to the left of my chin felt kind of okay while the chin itself and the right side of the chin felt super tingly and uncomfortable when touched. Now, I would say that I have 80% of the sensation back on the left side, while the right side now feels like how the left side used to feel. The chin almost matches the right side sensation, but it's still a little tingly. All in all, not bad!

Back on the Colace

This is the TMI portion. I stopped having to take Colace (for constipation) maybe a week ago. Now I'm all backed up again. So I started taking one Colace a day (down from three) and I bought ingredients to make myself a green smoothie every day. I probably should have done that since the beginning of my straw-eating capabilities. Ah well. If you're interested, here's what I put in my smoothie. It's simple and easy and I chop everything up and put it into a big container so that I only have to wash/chop a few times a week. Each day, I just blend it up in my handy dandy NurtiBullet.

• 1/2 cup crushed ice (to keep it cold while drinking)
• 1/4 of a big cucumber (8-10 inches)
• 1/2 of a medium sized apple (I like green delicious or fuji or pink lady apples)
• (optional for a thicker consistency: 1/2 of a banana OR a scoop of greek yogurt OR a tbsp of nut butter)
• 1 cup of baby kale & spinach
• 2/3 cup of coconut water (or apple juice for a sweeter smoothie)

You can obviously switch out the cucumber and maybe some of the leafy greens for whatever else is in your fridge - tomatos, romaine lettuce, zuchini, etc. And, instead of apples, you can use peaches or nectarines or berries. Then you get a better variety of vitamins and minerals and antioxidants!

Here's my face today, even though I think it looks like it did a week ago. Maybe next time I'll do a comparison. Or a whole series of pictures! Yeah, I wanna do that...

My lips are slightly crooked.
But less than before surgery, so it's cool.

I'm noticing that the sofa pictures are much better than the bathroom pictures. (This one is a bathroom pic.) I don't know why it took me 3+ weeks to notice that. Jeez.

Pain: 2-3/10

Numbness: Bottom gums numb on the outside portion. Chin area and right side of jaw still tingly/numb, but getting better. 

Discomfort: My cheeks keep getting stuck in the brackets when I talk. Wax/silicone all day every day.

Weight: -4 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

~m

Day 21: Three Weeks

(June 22nd, 2016)

A shitload of stuff happened today to make up for yesterday!

But first, an update video! 

Is it weird that my video cover pictures are not screenshots from the videos? I feel like that's some sort of false advertising. Whatevers!

Ortho Visit

It was a pretty quick visit, but the orthodontist changed out my bottom/front ligatures to a power chain. So now I have one long power chain across the top and three separate power chains on the bottom. I imagine he couldn't put in a long one on the bottom, even if he wanted to, cuz my cheeks are all swollen up against my back brackets. (And, man, do they hurt. I can't even spend one minute without the silicone.)

He also said he spoke with my surgeon: "I talked to Dr. Mandel and I asked him why you weren't wearing any rubber bands. He said your bite just came out so perfect you didn't need them!" Sweet.

So, while I'm TOTALLY HAPPY to not be wearing any runner bands for my bite, I think that the fact that I'm not makes some people think I'm basically all better. But my good friends are awesome and caring and know that I'm still slowly recovering.

My Sephora Makeover

Let me just say that I've been putting on makeup since I was 13. And I do a pretty good job of it! However, I can only do a few looks with confidence - a light cat eye, a serious cat eye, and a smokey cat eye. (Notice a pattern here?) So I was really excited for this makeover. As someone who spends a ridiculous amount of money at Sephora (I buy almost all of my makeup and skincare there, easily spending hundreds of dollars twice year when I stock up) I can get makeovers pretty much whenever I want without having to buy anything, but I'm usually just too lazy to schedule an appointment. But not this time! I asked for... a "cut crease" and/or "luminous, summery skin." I told her she could just do ONE of them if she thought it would look weird together. She said it would be fine. And then... she did this to my face...

OMG, isn't that AWEFUL??? I look like a clown. Or hooker. Actually, yeah, I look like a hooker. I kept being like, "wow, that looks crazy, but keep going. I wanna see the end result." It's not like her makeup was a clown mask. Wtf. My friends' responses: "Why are you so shiny?" "Why did she make your eyebrows so thick?" "That eyeliner is nuts." What I couldn't get over was the "cut crease." You see that terrible little shadow above my eye? That's the worst cut crease I've ever seen. Nobody walks around like that! How could she even let me walk out like that? I marched right into a restroom, wiped everything off, and put on some red lipstick. Better, right?

Now I don't know what to do. They have a customer satisfaction survey, but I feel bad saying that she did a terrible job. Especially when I thanked her when she was done, didn't complain, and didn't quite realize how horrendous I looked until I saw myself in a non-Sephora mirror. Maybe I can just upload my pictures so they can see the results for themselves? Or maybe that's what non-Asians think Asians should look like? No way, right? Yuk.

YouTube makeup tutorials, here I come!

Book Club Meeting

We went to Urban Plates (kinda like Tender Greens or Lemonade in concept) and we ordered ahi with squashes, a flatbread pizza, curried veggies over brown rice, mac and cheese, and a giant salad. Things I tried but couldn't/shouldn't really eat: pizza was too chewy, curried veggies were too hard, squashes were way too hard. Things I ate as my meal: ahi and the mac and cheese. Not bad. As long as there's something I can eat, I'm happy. :)

And my THREE WEEK picture:

Love red lipstick. I redid the whole face once I got home.

So I took a picture from a different angle to really show my swelling and my now-more-emphasized jowl lines. I hope they go away, but I don't think they will. I figure, with the movement of my jaw back into my face, these things might be permanent. Like old-lady face bags. (Sorry, old ladies.) Plus I'm getting pretty old myself, so I feel like I saw it starting already and now it'll just get worse.

Jowl lines taking up residence.

Pain: 2-3/10

Numbness: Bottom gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly, but the right side and chin more than the left side. 

Discomfort: My cheeks keep getting stuck in the brackets when I talk. Wax/silicone all day every day.

Weight: -4 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

Jaw surgery day 21, done. 

~m

Day 20: So Much Reading

(June 21st, 2016) 

Here's my day...

8:30 - noon: Start my book club book.
noon - 1:00: Get ready for a visit from a friend.
1:00 - 3:00: Visit from friend and her two daughters.
3:00 - 5:00: Finish my book club book.
5:30 pm: Realize that the book club meeting was changed to tomorrow, even though I already canceled my weekly dinner plans with another friend and rescheduled the dinner to tomorrow!

I'm a dummy.

What did I read today? Party Girl by Rachel Hollis. It was aight. Kinda silly, as the title suggests. But that's okay once in a while!

So, yeah, that was my day. It was pretty uneventful.

I think that, starting tomorrow, I'll start posting weekly instead of daily. Firstly, there's not too much to report. Secondly, my pictures are starting to look the same. Finally, nobody reads this anyway! Hahaha. That's okay - maybe someone will stumble upon it in 2018.

Here's me today:

Uh, my bronzer placement needs some work.

Pain: 2-3/10

Numbness: Bottom gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly, but the right side and chin more than the left side. 

Discomfort: My cheeks keep getting stuck in the brackets when I talk. Wax/silicone all day every day.

Weight: -4 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

Jaw surgery day 20, done. 

~m

Day 19: Ortho Stuffs

(June 20th, 2016)

Visit To the Surgeon

This was the quickest visit yet. He told me...

• Everything looks good - healing great.
• Start stretching my jaw/mouth open.
• Still no chewing.
• My stitched won't start dissolving for a few more weeks, but they can remove them if I want.
• (Still no rubber bands.) 

That's it. I see him in another week!

Orthodontic Stuffs

Since nothing of interest happened today, I thought I'd share my ortho experience with you guys in this post.

So I researched all/most of the different kinds of braces options:

• Invisalign - It wouldn't have worked for me. The results are less exact than what jaw surgery requires, at least in my case.
• Lingual Braces - These are the kind of braces that go on the inside of your teeth. Orthodontists who provide these kinds of braces are a little more rare, and none who I spoke with gave these as an option. Plus, watching videos, I notices that people who have these always have at least a little bit of a lisp. 
• Regular Metal Braces - As a high school math teacher, no thanks. I'm already self-conscious enough having to wear braces in front of teenagers. (Who, by the way, were totally fine with the braces. Although, I met a teacher with metal braces and watched her teach - I just think the metal look is distracting and weird.) 
• Damon Braces - These self-ligating braces can be metal or ceramic. The difference between these and traditional braces is that Damon braces don't require ligatures. Instead, each bracket has this little "door" that holds the wire in place. Unfortunately, my orthodontist doesn't do Damon. He thought it was all hype. (He actually helped design my braces, so I think he's just a little biased.) 
• Ceramic Braces - There are many different kinds, but I have 3M Clear braces. They're pretty small and clear, so they're really not very noticeable in pictures or from far away. (Students sitting 10 feet away would sometimes ask if I had my braces taken off already.) My sister's boyfriend had "clear" braces about 2 years ago and they looked terrible. They were all yellow and big and ridiculous looking. So be careful when you choose your braces! 

Okay, so the first few weeks of braces SUCKED. I (cussing is happening here) fucking hate braces. They hurt (kind of like the dull pain from jaw surgery) A LOT. I actually think I was depressed for a few days because I couldn't eat or talk for fear of pain. For the first month, I think I put silicone on almost every bracket. The brackets tore up the inside of my mouth for at least two months. Ugh, I hate them so much.

Plus, I stopped drinking red wine, dark sodas, and regular coffee. I stopped eating anything with curry, tomato sauce, beets, strawberries, cherries, blueberries, and most chocolates. Oh, and oatmeal, quinoa, and cottage cheese - I feel like more of these foods end up in my braces than my stomach. Even now, only eating mushy foods, I still stay away from foods and drinks that stain. (Once, I ate curry the night before getting my wires changes. The rubber bands were SO YELLOW and disgusting. Once they changed everything out, my teeth looked fine. But the stains just make me nervous that I'm going to stain the actual brackets, which supposedly will not happen.)

After a while, the braces are just a normal part of life. A totally annoying and hateful part of life. But, eh, I guess it's only temporary.

I've probably had about 4 or 5 brackets pop off at this point. I'm pretty sure only one was my fault, though - I was eating a rather tough piece of grilled chicken. All of the other brackets just popped off on their own. The only problem with this is that the ortho put some of the brackets back on crooked. Not cool, man.

I see my ortho about every 3 weeks, and it took almost exactly one year in braces before I was ready to have my surgery. And my teeth weren't even that bad! They straightened out the teeth a bit, shaved between each tooth to create more room, and pulled everything in tight. That way, I didn't need to have any teeth removed. I also didn't get any spacers or molar bands or headgear or expanders. So I guess I'm lucky.

Things You Need For Braces:

• a Waterpik (I love my Waterpik sooooooo much.)
• Colgate Peroxyl
• a little purse/travel kit that includes: 1) a baby/travel toothbrush with a cover to keep it clean, 2) travel toothpaste, 3) a collapsible cup 

And... my face.

Even though I hate braces, these are at least inconspicuous.

Pain: 2-3/10

Numbness: Bottom gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly, but the right side and chin more than the left side. 

Discomfort: My cheeks keep getting stuck in the brackets when I talk. Wax/silicone all day every day.

Weight: -4 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

Jaw surgery day 19, done. 

~m

Day 18: Father's Day

(June 19th, 2016)

OMG Don't Touch My Face!

Apparently, the husband's dad thinks that this is some kind of light cosmetic surgery. Cuz he reached out and (lightly) squeezed my chin and shook it! What the?! I basically yelped in shock.

And that's the difference between your own parents and in-laws. I've known his dad since I was a little kid, but it's still different. If my own dad did that (which he wouldn't because that's crazy after jaw and chin surgery!) I'd pretty much yell at him, "DAAAAAD, what are you doing??!?!? You can't do that!" But with the father in-law, I just made a noise and let my husband tell him that I'm still healing. (My husband doesn't yell at his dad. I don't know if that makes his family more normal, or less.)

For dinner, we went to a ramen place. It worked out great because I asked for "soft" noodles that I could pretty much bite off with my tongue against my upper teeth and then just slurp down. :) We bought a bunch of Maruchan ramen afterwards. Haha. (Maruchan is better than Top Ramen, btw. I learned this in college.)

Here's the face...

In the last picture I'm trying to suck in my cheeks!

Pain: 2-3/10 (Daytime is a 2, then it gradually becomes a 3 by dinnertime.)

Numbness: Same. Gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly, but the right side and chin more than the left side. 

Discomfort: My cheeks keep getting stuck in the brackets when I talk. Wax/silicone every day.

Weight: -4 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

Jaw surgery day 18, done. 

~m

Day 17: Fancy Restaurant

(June 18th, 2016) 

Family Time

Today I went out to a fancy lunch with my family to celebrate (pre-)Father's Day. I researched the restaurant early to make sure there was something I could eat - truffled potato leek soup. Doesn't that sound delicious? Well, it's not. It's super salty and watered down. And it cost $17. The view at The Loft (at The Montage) is great (you're basically overlooking the crashing waves beneath you) but I've been there at least three times by now and I've yet to be impressed with ANY of their food. My sister loves the place, but I'm over it.

You know where they have an excellent potato soup? CPK! When they opened one near my house I was SO SAD because it replaced an actually delicious restaurant, but when we finally went there we were pretty impressed! They totally changed their bearings. It's all open and urban looking and their menu is more aligned to current tastes. I sound like a commercial. Sorry. (It's pretty good tho.)

Of course my family kept commenting about my face. Nothing bad - just observations. "It almost looks like an overbite." "Your face looks like so and so's now." Things like that. But I'm trying to reserve any real judgement until 3 months post-surgery. I know I make a lot of observations on this blog, but I'm not actually concerned about anything yet - I know that it takes time to fully recover so there's no point in STRESSING about something now.

More Fast Food!

For dinner, I had a bean and cheese cup from Del Taco and chili cheese fries! I knew the bean and cheese cup would be fine, but I was a little worried about the fries. Luckily, there was so much chili and cheese that the fries got all soggy. :D Nom nom nom...

The jawline is usually really defined.

Pain: 2-3/10 (Daytime is a 2, then it gradually becomes a 3 by dinnertime.)

Numbness: Same. Gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly, but the right side and chin more than the left side. 

Discomfort: My cheeks keep getting stuck in the brackets when I talk. Wax/silicone every day.

Weight: -4 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

Jaw surgery day 17, done. 

~m

Day 16: McDonald's!

(June 17th, 2016)

I Ate a Filet-o-Fish!

Picking up a McFlurry and medium fries for hubby tonight, I crazily decided that I wanted to try eating a Filet-o-Fish. And... I did it! I tore it into bite-sized pieces, shoved them into my mouth one by one, and gnawed on each piece a little bit before swallowing. Success! :D I also had a few fries, but only the soggy ones. (I tried a regular one, but had to spit it out. Hubby was sad for the fry.)

Also, the fries were freeeee because I had downloaded the McDonald's app. What a great day! Haha.

More Feeling Faint

More shopping today = more feeling faint. I actually had to come home for a few hours before heading back out to shop. (Oh, the hardships I endure.) I've decided I can handle about an hour of activity before getting tired, and then I must eat/drink something.

On that note, I should start "exercising" soon. I was thinking that I should walk the routes that I usually run. Cuz the calorie burn should be the same(-ish) and it should increase my stamina, right?

My face today...

Sorry, I don't know why it's so faded and fuzzy.

Pain: 3/10 (Sometime between 6-8 pm every night, my jaw starts throbbing. It's a gentle "hey, don't forget you just had jaw surgery" kind of throb.)

Numbness: Same. Gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly, but the right side and chin more than the left side. 

Discomfort: My cheeks keep getting stuck in the brackets when I talk.

Weight: -4 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

Jaw surgery day 16, done. 

~m

Day 15: Feeling Faint

(June 16th, 2016)

Shopping

I went shopping and ran errands today for about 3 hours. Normally, that would be nothing to me - my typical Summer day involves working out, seeing friends, shopping, running errands, and generally being out and about. (Or staying at home and watching TV/being online all day when I'm lazy.) Today, after about an hour, I started getting reeeaaally tired. I powered through for another hour. By the time I made it to Target, I found myself standing in the middle of the store with my hand to my chest (uh, my chest hurts sometimes - is that a problem?) feeling kind of dizzy and faint. I mean, I didn't feel like I was gonna keel over. I just felt... woozy? I remembered that I hadn't eaten in way too long, so I decided to get a kale and avocado smoothie from their new Freshii mini-restaurant. It was delicious, but tiny. And it cost $6. (And they don't take Target cards.) But it made me feel way better so it was a good call.

Other than that, nothing remarkable happened today. :P

Actually, I did do my makeup a little bit differently today. I normally only put eyeliner on the top outer half of my eyes, but today I decided to go heavy with liner and shadow under the eye as well (which I did for at least 6 months last year - not sure why). And now that I'm looking through some of my daily pictures, I'm realizing that it makes me look older and generally tired. Noted. Totally not doing that anymore.

See, up close the eyes don't look so bad! Now I know.
("And knowing is half the battle." Sorry I couldn't help it.
I bet most of you don't remember what cartoon that's from.)

Pain: 3/10 (Still no painkillers, yeah!)

Numbness: Same. Gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly.

Discomfort: My cheeks keep getting stuck in the brackets when I talk.

Weight: -4 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.)

Jaw surgery day 15, done. 

~m

Day 14: Two Weeks

(June 15th, 2016)

A Video!

I wish wish wish I did this before the surgery. It's so hard to tell what the exact differences are in my speech and smile without a side by side comparison. I know it'll change as the swelling goes down, but still. Oh well. Also, this is a terrible clip of my video cover photo! :-/

Parents... 

I totally love my parents. They are so sweet and loving and caring, especially now, bringing me food every few days and checking up on me. But I got the most annoying texts today. From both parents.

They asked how I was doing, so I sent them a picture. My dad wrote back, "So beautiful, congratulations!" In a separate text message thread, my mom wrote, "So pretty! Like a movie star now!" WTF. I know they're probably just trying to make me feel better about the swelling and what not, but it felt... insulting? My parents KNOW why I got this surgery. Plus, I was already un-ugly. Yes, yes, that's vain, whatever. I'm just saying.

Anyway, my mom came to visit and I told her to please not comment on my looks right now because I just don't like it very much. She totally understood, cuz then she goes, "Oh, I know this isn't cosmetic. It's for your bite, yes, yes. Okay."

As a side note, I think the focus on looks and being vocal about how other people look (to their faces, not just behind their backs like normal people) could be an older Asian thing. Older Chinese people say things like,

• Ohhh, you gained weight, huh?
• What's that on your chin? A pimple? 
• Your skin looks terrible - stay out of the sun.
• You lost weight! What, like 20 pounds?

My parents generally don't say these kind of things to me, but it's really common with all of the aunties and uncles (parent's friends) and you just have to grit your teeth and smile. However, my favorite comment came from my dad when I was 16. He patted my cheek and said, with a smile on his face and I'm pretty sure love in his heart, "Good thing you're not fat. You wouldn't be pretty fat." Nice one, right? I think my response was, "Daaaaaaaaad! You can't say that to a teenage girl!!!" But he just laughed and said it was basically a compliment. Hahahahaha.  

Here's me today:

I'm gonna keep doing these lip pics, sorry.
I wanna see when/if it dissipates.

Pain: 3/10 (Today I woke up and, since it didn't hurt so much, I didn't take any painkillers. But around dinnertime it started to throb some. Still no Advil/Aleve. I'm gonna try to tough it out. I don't know why...) 

Numbness: Same. Gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly. (When something brushes against my chin, I feel SOOOO uncomfortable all the way INSIDE. It's so weird. It almost reverberates into my teeth or something.)

Discomfort: My cheeks keep getting stuck in the brackets when I talk.

Weight: -4 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

Jaw surgery day 14, done. 

~m

Day 13: Eating Out (twice!)

(June 14th, 2016)

Souplantation

Did you know that Soup Plantation is actually called Souplantation? Probably not, because it only exists in Southern California. (Oh yeah, that's where I live btw.) One of my favorite people mentioned once that Souplantation is called Sweet Tomatoes in other parts of the country. I guess it has to do with the term "plantation" and its not-so-awesome connotations? But I don't see how it should be okay here; it's not like there aren't any black people in Southern California. :-/

Anyway, my friend came to visit me today and we went to Souplantation for lunch. What better place to find a mushy soup, right? Alas, totally blended up soups must not be very popular. There were chunks in everything. Haha. But I DID eat and it was delicious. I took a baked potato, smashed it up with sour cream and butter, and put chicken broth in it. Then I did it again cuz it was so tasty. Then I had a root beer float, cuz yum. I don't think I've eaten that much since the surgery! So good. 

Soondubu

Then, another friend came over for dinner and we decided to try soondubu (aka Korean soft tofu soup). I ordered plain white soup with just tofu. (You can get white, mild, medium, medium-spicy, or spicy, but the spicier your soup the redder the soup. Now that I have ceramic braces I don't eat red things  like tomato sauce, red wine, Asian spicy things, curry, or anything else that stains. So sad. Actually, it's my own vanity I guess. I just figure it's pointless for me to pay for ceramic braces and then walk around with yellow/dirty teeth for 2 years.) I stirred an egg into my soup and dipped white rice into it. I felt like a normal person, sitting there gulping down my soup! 

And... my face... 

That upper lip tho.

Both of my lips are different, actually. My upper lip is a little puffier, while my bottom lip is MUCH smaller. The corners of my bottom lip don't stick out anymore - they've basically disappeared. And the center of my bottom lip is a little smaller as well. With lipstick, my lips "look" is totally different than it used be. It's... uh... cute, I guess. But kinda weird to me.

Pain: 3/10

Numbness: Same. Gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly.

Discomfort: Somebody said this in a YouTube video and I agree - "It's like you have a headache, but in your jaw. And it doesn't go away." I would add that, when it gets worse, it throbs.

Weight: -4 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

Jaw surgery day 13, done. 

~m

Day 12: Second Surgeon's Visit

(June 13th, 2016)

Confirmation (of my theory) 

The ladies at my doctor's office are all so nice! Actually, most everyone's really nice to you right after jaw surgery. :P

They walked me to the "back" of the office and got everything all set up to clean my wounds and brush my teeth. While waiting for the doctor, I heard one assistant say to the other, "No, he didn't put any rubber bands on her because her bite is so good. It's perfect!" So there you go. I was right. And it totally makes sense - the surgeon is given x-rays, CT scans, and molds of teeth to predict what he/she might do during surgery, then the surgeon has 1) his/her plans and 2) a surgery splint to make our jaws perfectly in line and our bites perfect? That is ridiculous. In 2016, this is what I imagine should be happening: We stick our heads into a super-face machine that determines where every bone and tooth and muscle and nerve is, then the machine calculates exactly where our bones need to be cut to perfectly align our jaws, and finally it determines our correct teeth placement before the surgery because everyone's "correct teeth placement" is different. After the orthodontist is given a series of wires to perfect our teeth, we are ready for surgery. The surgeon supervises the surgery while another machine lasers up our jaws and stitches everything up. Right?!?! I think I'm imagining something akin to those medical machines in the movie Elysium (with Matt Damon). Seriously, though, doesn't that seem almost-possible by now?

Sorry - I got off track. So the doctor comes in, checks out my bite and stitches, and tells me:

• My bite looks great. 
• My mouth and teeth are really clean. 
• I still can't chew.
• I can start stretching my bite/jaws a little bit.
• I should try to talk normally (instead of closed-teeth, which is more comfortable).
• I can't jog or do any other bouncy/strenuous activity.
• I can ride a stationary bike if I want.

Next time I go back, I don't have to go to the back of the office anymore. That's where all the cleaning supplies are set up, which I didn't end up needing. Woo! And still no rubber bands! Double woo!!

Talking to Myself

So I'm driving around after the doctor's visit and I realize that the only way for me to practice talking more (since I talk to basically nobody during the day... sitting at home... by myself) is to talk to myself. Of course I start right then, in the car. I'm getting all mouthy and animated and then my cheek gets stuck in a bracket. Like, reeeeally stuck. :( Since my cheek is all crazy stitched up, it took forever for me to figure out how to un-stick the bracket. And by forever, I mean probably close to a minute. But it hurt. And then it happened again tonight.

So I'm using these again. I like them better than wax cuz they're cheaper, they're more pliable, and they stick better.

Okay, my face today...

I skipped the neck photo today to show
you guys my filler-ed up upper lip.

Pain: 3/10 (That's .5 less!)

Numbness: Same. Gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly.

Discomfort: I feel okay today... just the general jaw throbbing.

Weight: -4 lbs (That's 1 pound less! But I bet it'll come right back cuz I bought two pints of ice cream today.)

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

Jaw surgery day 12, done. 

~m

Day 11: How do YOU Chew?

(June 12th, 2016)

I laughed so hard today that I started crying. 

I was explaining to hubby how, when I pretend to chew and move my jaw around, it doesn't do what it used to anymore. My teeth all fit together (I can feel all of my molars touching) but it doesn't feel like I can pulverize my food in the same way. Before, I would chew up-down but mostly grind left-right. Or at least that's what I remember. Whereas, now, I can pretty much only chomp up-down. The side to side motion seems to have diminished. Anyway, I tell the husband this and he goes, "You used to chew like a cow? Cuz people don't chew that way." WHAT? I've been chewing wrong my whole life? I mean, I know that I had trouble with fibers (think old spinach and tough meat) - I would sometimes have to either swallow a chunk of fibers or sneakily spit it into my napkin. But I was chewing it like a COW?!? That's ridiculous. It seemed efficient enough to me. (But what did I know?) When I can chew again, I'm gonna test this out on the most fibrous meal possible. So, like, skirt steak on top of non-baby spinach with a side of beef jerky?

Omg, I just realized - that's why I only buy baby spinach! Wow.

Not Ready for the Movies Yet

I really wanted to see the new X-Men movie this weekend, but every time we leave the house for a test run I get super tired. Today, we went to Ralph's (yup, that's my big outing) and on the way out I felt like I was gonna fall asleep. By the time we got home I was SOOO tired I just sat there for a few hours. (Haha, that's actually normal now. Me just sitting on my ass.) But I just sat - no playing on my phone or iPad. That's how tired I was!

Doctor's Visit Tomorrow

I was really excited for my first visit last week, but this time not so much. I think I'm a little nervous that he's gonna put rubber bands in my mouth. That's what he said, "maybe next week." But my bite feels pretty good, so we'll see.

My face today:

Look at the upper lip in the neck picture. It's so puffy!

For comparison, here are my ortho photos from before the surgery. It's literally not possible for my face to be thinner than it was before (since I'm still swollen and I barely lost any weight) but my chin looks pointier now. ?!? No way. Camera trick? And now I can see the swelling around my jawline - look how defined it was in those profile pics!

OLD pics from right before surgery.

Pain: 3.5/10

Numbness: Same. Gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly.

Discomfort: The inside of my cheeks still hurt. Otherwise just slightly achy and tired.

Weight: -3 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

Jaw surgery day 11, done. 

~m

Day 10: Oh My Cheeks!

(June 11th, 2016)

My Poor Cheeks

My cheeks have been hurting me lately - maybe starting yesterday? (By the way, the general jaw pain is better today! Which is probably why I started to notice the cheek situation.) So today I stuck my finger in my mouth to feel around and it felt super weird and jagged and crazy in there! Of course I whipped out my cell phone flashlight to get a better look. What's it look like? Like someone took the tip of knife and sliced up my cheeks to bits. Then just left it like that. (There are probably some stitches deep in those cheeks, but I can't see them or feel them.) I made hubby take a look and he thought it looked crazy as well. I spent much of the day imagining food bits getting stuck in the folds and growing happy little bacteria families. I tried to take a picture, but it's a little blurry. I'll put it wayyyyy under my normal daily photos, so you can scroll down if you wanna take a look. It's pretty gross.

My Favorite Videos (& More Blogs)

As promised, here are my favorite jaw surgery videos/vlogs on YouTube. Some are single videos, while others are a series of vlogs. (For the vlogs, I'm posting the first video in the series.)

Double Jaw Surgery: Before, During and After
(Pictures & Videos)

Jaw Surgery Journey (#1)

Braces & Jaw Surgery Update #9

And here are two specific blog posts that I really liked as well. I would just add them to my favorite blogs list, but they're like real bloggers so these posts get lost in their sea of fashion/health posts.

• This story on THUNDER AND THREADS is from a blogger in Ireland. She has videos embedded in her blog posts and I think I really enjoyed listening to her cute accent. Haha. The surgery portion of her blog was pretty informative and interesting. 

• This article on THE SKINNY CONFIDENTIAL is a one-off about her jaw issues and surgery experience. It's not detailed in terms of what to expect while healing, but I appreciated her honestly and sense of humor. 

Obviously, as you already know, there are a TON of videos and blogs out there. These are just the ones I like read/watch over and over again for whatever reason. 

And here's my face today. (The pictures of my cheeks are way down under this...)

Those bruises just don't seem like they're going anywhere.

Pain: 3.5/10

Numbness: Same. Gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly.

Discomfort: My cheeks hurt, so I keep puffing out my cheeks to make them not rest on my brackets. It's... annoying?

Weight: -3 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

Jaw surgery day 10, done. 

~m

(keep scrolling down)

I think this one has a white spot in there
cuz it got caught on my bracket today. :(

And here's the other cheek.

Day 9: More of the Same

(June 10th, 2016)

Feeling blegh.

Today was my most "blegh" day yet. I think it's a mix of having no interaction with other people (other than the husband) and still being in more-than-usual pain. Which I think I figured out, by the way - the fixing of my bracket at the ortho's office on day 7 took about 30 minutes and he only noticed it because that tooth had started moving already. So my jaw is tired from being open for so long and my bottom teeth must be moving right now. (But my gums are numb, so I only feel the pressure/discomfort from the movement.) That makes sense, doesn't it? I dunno. 

Fooooood.

So I figured out a meal plan for myself. I'm pretty happy with it: 

Breakfast: Put half a banana, a scoop of almond butter, half of a chocolate Muscle Milk, and crushed ice in the NutriBullet. Blend. Add fat straw. SO GOOD. 

Lunch: Make instant mashed potatoes with half teaspoon of truffle cream. Add either chicken soup gel or oxtail stew gel (soup/stew destroyed by the Vitamix). Tastes like gravy-ed up mashed potatoes. 

Dinner: Make a super-soft 3-egg scramble. (I add water to the eggs; I don't know why.) Pour the eggs into a nonstick pan on medium low heat, then stir until the eggs are cooked. It won't seem like anything's happening at first, but then it all just comes together. Add it to.... you guessed it... instant mashed potatoes with half teaspoon of truffle cream! Add truffle salt if you have it. Cuz why not. 

I also randomly have baby food packets and yogurt and hubby makes me drink blended fruit every night. Oh, and I think I drink a full cup of milk every 6 hours with my meds. Haha, no wonder I'm keeping my weight on. 

What does my food look like, you ask? Like this! 

I've actually enjoyed eating these things. We'll see when I get sick of them.

Okay, and here's my face today. 

The front of my neck hurts a little bit. Like it's sore.

Okay, so I feel that I have to mention the fact that I'm wearing the same white flannel and black tank top in literally every picture. The reason for this fact is that I'm lazy. I cannot be bothered to change into "real clothes" and have to think about what those clothes should be. Ridiculous. 

I said that I'd post my favorite videos today, but.. I'll do it tomorrow. Tired now. Sorry. 

Pain: 4.5/10

Numbness: Same. Gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly.

Discomfort: My jaw throbs. I'm feeling down.

Weight: -3 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

Jaw surgery day 9, done. Ready for a new day. 

~m

Day 8: It Hurts...

(June 9th, 2016)

Hi guys,

I think the excitement of yesterday wiped me out. Right before bedtime, my sister came to visit and we chatted for a good 20 minutes. That, along with my eating with a spoon and brushing every crevice in my mouth multiple times a day, definitely made my entire jaw area more sore today. I've described it before as a "dull" pain, but at the same time it's this constantly throbbing pain as well. Sometimes it's a gentle throbbing, if there is such a thing, and other times it a more consistent this-sucks-I'm-totally-sad kind of throbbing pain. But it's still not enough for me to take the hydrocodone - that stuff just wipes me out. Maybe for bedtime. I'll think about it.

So my day consisted of no TV! Is that insane? I just sat around all day watching YouTube videos. (That's kinda like, TV, tho, huh?) I re-watched a bunch of jaw surgery vlogs and I also learned how to create the perfect brow.

I wonder if I can list my favorite vlogs on my blog. Is that weird? Is it like stealing? No, right, cuz I'm linking to their videos. I don't know, though... ? I should look up "blog etiquette" and see what they say. Haha.

Okay, I looked it up and I still can't tell. Something about link-ups and reciprocal commenting and other things I can't be bothered with. I'm just gonna do it. Tomorrow.

Here's what I look like today.

I lessened the Jaw Bra wearing after day 4,
but it's back on again.

Pain: 4/10

Numbness: Same. Gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly.

Discomfort: Ugh. Sucks. Continuous pain = super lethargic.

Weight: -3 lbs (At this rate, I'm going to be the first person in history to have gained weight after jaw surgery.)

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.)

Jaw surgery day 8, done. 

~m

Day 7: First Ortho Visit

(June 8th, 2016)

An Orthodontist Visit

So I noticed right after my surgery that one of my bottom brackets had come loose. Btw, can I just interject here that my "surgical hooks" are not what I thought they'd be? I've seen lots of surgical hooks online.

They look like this:

Whereas mine look like this:

I mean, it doesn't matter, but I wonder why mine are basically looped wire ties. Are they faster to put in? (It doesn't seem so, since the ortho himself had to tie each loop.) Are they cheaper? (Uh, yeah, they were free. I saw a few people who paid up to $10 per hook!) Is my wire too weak/thin to hold the regular hooks in place? (Maybe. I have no idea what wire I have. I wanna say "18 square," but I could also be making that number up.)

So, anyway, I got to see me ortho today. I definitely did NOT think he'd be fixing my bracket today (it's the right bottom tooth, and I have stitches all along my bottom gum line), but as soon as I opened my mouth to talk to him and show him my non-rubber-banded-up teeth he goes, "And you have a bracket that popped off! It's caused your tooth to move already; let's fix that." What the heck? He saw that in like 5 seconds! I mean, I know this is his profession and all, but wow.

So, incredibly, they pulled the wire out a little, affixed the bracket, and tucked the wire back in. And this is a week out from jaw surgery! These people are crazy.

Everyone at the office was really encouraging about my progress. Supposedly, if not for my crazy neck and chest bruises, I'd just look like a version of myself with chubby jowls. Haha. They also really liked my day 3 picture, which I myself find super fun. The most interesting (and somewhat troubling) thing I learned, though, was that my orthodontist has NEVER seen another jaw surgery patient who had no splint and zero rubber bands in their mouth a week after jaw surgery. This is unheard of. (My orthodontist is very... uh... experienced. He's seen a lot of stuff! And he's worked closely with my surgeon for many years.) I'm trying to console myself with the thought that maybe jaw surgeries, combined with adjusted teeth that are only modeled to line up perfectly but may not actually, are just really hard to get PERFECT. So maybe most of the outcomes are good, some are pretty good, and once in a while there's a perfect surgery/bite outcome. And maybe I'm that pretty-much-almost-perfect bite. Maybe?

That bruise is amazing in person. 

Eating Foooood

Eating is SOOO much easier with a straw and spoon! Omg, did I not mention that I can use a spoon now? I figured if I could get a toothbrush in there, then maybe I could fit a spoon inside. And I can! We went out to CPK today and I had potato soup. Like a normal person. Straws and spoons make life so much easier! On the way home, we bought me some more instant mashed potatoes. I'm having it with everything...

Pain: 2-4/10

Numbness: Gums totally numb. Chin area very stiff/tingly.

Discomfort: I'm definitely feeling better, since I was able to drive myself around today. In general, a dull headache-y pain throughout the day.

Weight: -4 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

Jaw surgery day 7, done. 

~m

Day 6: No Splint/Rubber Bands?!

(June 7th, 2016)

Surgeon's Visit

I woke up so excited to get that chin bandage off! Lucky for me, the appointment was at 9:00 am, so I didn't have to wait all day to get over there. Hubby drove me over, and then...

The surgeon took off the four rubber bands that were in my mouth! For good! (Well, maybe not for good, but for now at least.) I told him that my bite felt almost perfect and he goes, "Oh, I was hoping we could take some of those rubber bands out today. Maybe even all of them. Hmm, lemme see..." Then he looks around in there and I bite down a few times (I can open my teeth about 1 cm?) and he says, "Oh, that bite looks great. Yeah, let's go ahead and take all these out." What the hell?! So my response is, "Uh, really?" He asks me what I'm worried about, I say something about reading about regression, and then he and his assistant chuckle, "Oh, gosh, don't read all that stuff on the internet!" So, yeah, I dunno - I got no explanation but I guess my bite feels pretty good right now, sooo...?

So the rest of the day, I've just been in shock. Oh, and I finally posted about my jaw surgery on Facebook. Just a little update - definitely no pictures or sad stories. But some people did ask for pictures, so I sent them a few privately. For whatever reason, I love sending my friends pictures of my swollen face! It's so interesting! (Actually, I always send my friends gross pictures - when I got gum grafting, when I had to get stitches from surfing, when I thought I had pinkeye...)

Oh, my doctor also said:

• I can suck on a straw.
• I can swish water/mouthwash around in my mouth.
• Still be careful not to "brush" at my stitches. 
• Still don't use my Waterpik. (but I already started to on the LOWEST setting; I told him so)
• I can sleep laying down now. (but I don't think I will until I'm less swollen)
• I asked, "Can I chew?" and he didn't really answer. So I'm not chewing, just in case. 
• My swelling has gone down well but I have way more bruising than most people.

As I was going down my list of questions, he says, "You can talk with your mouth open, it's okay." So I've been trying to do that today, but it feels really stiff.

I'm totally gonna get pimples.

Regarding the removal of my chin bandage. So we have this citrus wax remover that we use on our snowboards and surfboards whenever we have to re-wax. It smells super strong and you're supposed to use it in a well ventilated area. And you don't get that shit on your skin. Well, I think they used that stuff on my face to melt the adhesive from the bandage! I mean, it could have been something else, but it smelled the same and had the same consistency. And that bandage was TIGHT on my skin. It was fine, but I definitely think that at least some of the skin troubles people seem to have after this surgery has got to do with getting a layer of their skin slowly peeled off and then having wax/glue remover oil slathered on right afterwards. Ouch. And yuk. I can already see a little whitehead forming on my chin. That, along with my shiny new cold sore and my crazy chin and neck bruises, make me feel HAWT.

I feel like the picture doesn't quite capture how square
my face is looking right now.

Side note: I can drink out of a cup today! I just rest the rim of the cup on my bottom lip and tilt my head back. :D It makes "eating" much easier.

Pain: 3-5/10

Numbness: My gum are still totally numb. And, now that the bandage is off, I realize that my entire chin is tingly (like, from the corners of my lower lip all the way down) and weird-feeling. 

Discomfort: I feel a little more energized today. A friend came to visit and we walked 20 minutes or so and I didn't get tired during the walk. (Felt pretty sleepy afterwards, though.)

Weight: -3 lbs

(Black items stayed the same as the last post. RED items changed slightly.) 

Jaw surgery day 6, done. 

~m